Something To Talk About

- Bonnie Raitt

Everywhere we go, it seems like everyone is asking Pacino and I The Universal question...So, when are you having kids? Excuse me, but when exactly did my reproductive history become public fodder to mull over at every encounter...and I mean literally everybody. Enquiring minds really Do want to know!

It’s quite understandable if family and friends bother us about the baby issue considering we’ve been married almost 2 ½ years. They’re not in panic-mode just yet, but the urgency is building up as they try to figure out if we’ll drag it out (After all, we only went out 9 years before tying the knot, haha!). But the thing is, it’s not just family anymore...literally everyone is shooting the question at us.

For one thing, all of my customers that I deal with on a close basis are practically keeping track of my ovulation cycle and are not shy at all about giving me pointers on the methods, timing and other details and rituals of conception (keep in mind that all of my customers are middle-aged men!). A couple of months ago, I missed a day off work to have the carpet guy come and wash our carpets. Curly told me that when she told my customers that I wasn’t in that day, the first thing they all asked was, Why is she not in, is she pregnant? Since when did my fertility become breaking news, an issue of such importance that it took precedence over everything else on their agenda. Personally, I think they’re apprehensive that the minute I get pregnant, I’ll be off and neglecting their projects...Which, I probably am, considering I can’t be playing around with chemicals during my pregnancy...BUT, Geez, there’s a freakin’ limit on expressing interest on the goings’on in my boudoir....Nuff’said!

Last month, Pacino and I had gone to get my car serviced, and the next thing you know, even the Parts & Service guy is asking us when we’re planning on having the Bambino. This is absolutely ludicrous. I see this guy like 4-5 times a year and even he has taken an interest in our parenting plans. I think I’m going to take an add out in the paper when the time comes, or maybe make an announcement on the radio to advise all of Montreal. Whos’ next? I keep expecting the garbage guy to knock on my door and say " Hey, I haven’t seen any diapers in your garbage, what’s the deal?